No one asked for this but I guess my self indulgence means Yr gonna get it and maybe like one person will enjoy it!
TL:DR and Grammar Fails Warning
This song started life by recycling some parts of old songs that I liked the ideas of but was never really happy with the execution.The title and verse kinda came from a convo on Tumblr about the welsh word Cwtch having no literal English translation and I really liked how something with no literal translation was explained exactly the same way by so many different people. It’s kinda where the journey starts, like the song is about being bored in yr hometown and there being nothing to do and how it always rains on bank holidays (it always does trust me!) and I guess, I’d gradually managed to fall out with lots of people just due to my dis-satisfaction with my general existence and then I met a girl, who absolutely blew me away, and the chorus was about a Saturday night where I’d been invited out to see some people I hadn’t seen in a long time, but I kinda knew was gonna end badly so I blew it off and went and hung out with this awesome girl I’d just started dating and she was sitting on her doorstep smoking a roll up and we were listening to On and On by The Longpigs (my choice, from my weird brief 2012 obsession with that band) and then as the song finished a load of fireworks went off over the train station by her house and we both laughed and it was this just really sweet and magical moment that kinda doesn’t happen IRL andd I guess when I was writing the record in hindsight part of me maybe thought that despite being bored as fuck and frustrated as fuck with life generally, maybe a relationship with the right person could sustain it. But sadly relationship with said Girl didn’t last (100% my fault).
I’ve had this song for a while and It’s a complete and utter rip off of an Ace Bushy Striptease song that gradually morphed its self into a Galaxie 500 song. I think that all the songs flowed together consciously and subconsciously. I think the lyrics to this one are pretty self explanatory. I always say its about hating Croydon though I don’t necessarily think its about hate as much as realising all you have left is memories and none of those were really as good as you wanted them to be anyway. As nostalgia creeps in you’ll miss those things that happened and romanticise them to be better than they probably were whilst listening to some kind of sad song. The Bruce Springsteen song I’m PROBABLY talking about is Atlantic City. The Morrissey song could be anything I don’t really know. This is also the first song that’s a subtle nod to the genius of Ben Parker.
3. Living Ghost:
This started out as me mis-playing the riff to Dramamime by Modest Mouse but ended up sounding more like Johnny Foreigner or something. The song is a generally miserable “breakup” song I guess and I guess this is where it fitted in the #concept kind of being a callback to Cwtch like I’m Stewart Lee or something. It’s kind of about, when things are going bad you let yr mind wander to the people where its gone bad before and yr memories and people will have changed since you last spoke and you kinda hope they’re super happy now, but they’ll be forever frozen in time in yr memories like a ghost and I guess even if they did come back and you started talking again it wouldn’t necessarily be the same and thats probably ok I guess.
This is like Sonic Youth does Born To Run and our most complete attempt at being the world’s worst Nosferatu D2 tribute band. The riff is meant to be a amalgamation of Ben Parker, Thurston Moore and Mike Kinsella’s styles. It’s kind of the angrier more bitter non gendered relation of Sulk. Realising you’ve got to a point where there’s no point dwelling you’ve gotta make that leap because yr just gonna get more bitter and angry and then yr gonna internalise it and be bored and start to externalise it by hating on everyone and becoming isolated for no real reason. the ‘You could burn down my home town,” is a direct reference to/crib from Springsteen by Nosferatu D2. I really like Nosferatu D2. (REALLY)
5. Yr So last So Last Summer:
Yes, The title is a Taking Back Sunday reference. The song it’s self is about splurging everything thats in Yr head at this cool girl you’ve just met and her getting freaked out and then going to a house party and getting INCREDIBLY drunk and being on a trampoline in Streatham wondering WTF yr doing with life and how you need to stop trying so hard to do things you think will make you feel better/happy without actually working out why you feel so shit in the first place. It’s kind of the line which things are drawn under, where self improvement begun. It started off like me trying to merge Johnny Foreigner Vs Everything style piano riff With Passenger Seat by Death Cab style Piano Riff annddd like Things and Stuff by Joey Fourr (which is still my fav Joey Fourr song).
This is about the night I met a friend of a friend and we began this thoroughly doomed on and off nearly relationship that lasted probably far too long to be any good for either of us. Though the first night we met was pree Perfect in that kind of yr both drunk enough to not be cynical about how YA fiction this has all been. There’s obvs a reference to Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless mind, and the line about giants is meant to be a semi lift from We Look Liked Giants by Death Cab. It’s about the idea of running again I guess or maybe finding somewhere to stop running and how we were both at University and had ended up in this weird but gorgeous field and you could see stars down the side of the A3 and there was stars and rain and much cliche, such outdated meme.
7.’No New Messages’:
I wrote the lyrics to this on the way back from seeing Johnny Foreigner at Birthdays. It’s obviously got another call back because, #concept and #stewartleefanboy but its kinda part 2 to Suburbs. Same girl, same situation just months down the line and lots of frustration later. It’s kinda just to let frustration out. I don’t have anything bad to say about her though. She’s a good human and I was never mad at her just frustrated I guess with the situation.
8. Misery Gutz:
This song literally just like fell out of my brain with a lot of the lyrics. I just picked up a guitar and song the chorus straight out pretty much. It’s all kind of the same kind of themes and kind of, for whatever reason how much I kind of internally tore myself up a little over the situation with the girl and how it played on my mind a lot and really made me feel weird mentally for a short period of time. The verses are a little less specific and took longer to write, and I kinda cribbed together lots of ideas for longer things I wanted to say into the framework so only some of them make sense and something loneliness, something casual hook ups coupled with never really getting over feeling weird at like 15 and never being able to realise you’ve kinda got past that weird awkwardness and you can be comfortable in yrslf and no one is gonna judge you for it but still carrying the past with you and stuff. another ghosts reference. I think I mention ghosts a lot on this record. spooky.
9. Weak Egos:
I can’t really remember what I was trying to rip off but there was definitely something. This is an apology to various different people for how much of a dick I’d been and how much I missed them and how I’d kinda like to make things right when I feel grown up enough to talk to them again, if fate allows us to somehow bump into each other. The title comes from a lecture at University about psychoanalysis and how our lecturer was all like, ‘why is no one answering any of my questions?’ when we’re all just sitting there listening to Freud’s theories and like re-considering our entire lives. I’ve always kinda wondered in a weird way if the people that songs directly relate to will ever hear the record or read this and kinda realise or not.Probably not.
10. False Alarm: possibly my favourite song on the record. This isn’t about a specific person but it kind of is. It’s kind of about how I do this thing in my head when I feel bad about stuff where I think if I change the way I look I’ll change the way I feel and I can be the person I want to. It’s kind of the end point of the near relationship too. I guess it’s slightly bitter but at fate more than the other person and at more than one person and just bitter at myself for being lame and shit and for being immature maybe.I like the catharsis of playing this live but I’ve lost/broken/damaged cables, capos, mic stands just kinda throwing myself around to this song. It’s kind of like the end of the story but not.
11. Over (It): Kinda a prologue I guess, It’s pretty self explanatory and its about how maybe just being yrslf is ok and maybe I should draw a line under everything that’s kinda gone on in the past.There’s more ghosts and I guess me trying to tell myself to just stop and just stop worrying. Those things are over, but you can do whatever if you want to.